But today I wanted to write about something that I wasn't comfortable writing on the Facebook page I share with my husband's coworkers and my family members. That's the one thing I hate about Facebook, how I edit myself because of the audience, there are some personal things that The Vamp's coworkers don't need to know about and there are times when I just want to avoid family drama.
I decided to get back in touch with my spiritual side recently, and while I have not made a braid in my hair or put an earring in my ear, I did put a string around my wrist (Four strings to be exact). It's been weeks since I bought the bracelets and tied them on and wearing them has been more profound than I thought it would.
I catch glimpses of my wrist with the bracelets and I don't see my almost 50 year old arm with the pink and purple bracelets, I see into my pasts, younger arms, different bracelets made of hemp and wooden beads, leather and bone, bracelets with bells and feathers, talismans of different journeys and the different persons I was.
And yet, despite the differences, it's still me. I'm still here. Still asking questions. Still wandering the world.
I was looking at my wrist, noticing the faded colors on the bracelets, seeing the frayed end of the knots, seeing the stains and imperfections in these formerly pristine pieces of thread. And I realized they were still beautiful and perfect, so I brought my wrist to my face and I smelled the flowery Neutrogena Body Oil and the Patchouli and Orange of my favorite perfume and I realized the bracelets were becoming imbued with my essence, that they were becoming a part of me and I felt comforted by the knowledge that everything is working as it should. That despite my fears and doubts, my quest was being completed, that I would find answers.
I am learning what I need to know, even if I'm not aware of it.
Who knows, I may start another braid and put an earring in my ear, and wear a talisman on a leather thong around my neck.
Or maybe not.
Who knows what the future brings?
